Perhaps this should come as no surprise for a newspaper (The Sun) that is a fully paid up part of the Murdoch media empire but even so I find it shocking that a well known newspaper Agony Aunt, who is supposed to help those facing personal difficulties, is actually endorsing a blatant attempt to scam the bereaved just at a time when they are most vulnerable and not able to defend themselves.
What the hell does an organisation (Cruse Bereavement Care) that needs people to make confidential calls to it without hindrance think it is doing using a phone number that costs up to 40p per minute on a mobile and is also excluded even from BT's calling plans at all times because it uses the ripoff uncontrolled Trojan Horse of 0844 that Ofcom so purposefully and cynically permitted several years ago.
Does Deirdre perhaps take pride in being a numpty on personal finance, even though she alleges to be an expert when it comes to personal distress? But hang on isn't being ripped off for substantial telephone charges that you didn't know in advance you were going to have to pay also likely to cause many people acute personal distress too?
Published: TodayMY great-grandma is threatening to top herself – which so upsets my grandma she’s even started smoking again.
I’m 16. My great-granddad died four years ago and my great-grandma, who’s 86, moved in with my grandparents. They’re in their sixties.
She has been a total nightmare. She just hasn’t given my grandma time to grieve at all.
I go to visit her most Saturdays. Each time I see her she starts moaning about my great-granddad’s death and it really upsets me. My gran went to see her doctor about her mother and he just gave her anti-depressants. She refuses to take them because she doesn’t like taking pills.
My gran is getting really stressed and takes it out on who ever is around. She’s even started smoking again.
I’ve tried talking to my great-grandma and gran separately but it just doesn’t work. I’m afraid my gran will do something to herself or her mum. This is all starting to get to me.
Deidre SaysI am really sorry you are caught up in your grandparents’ troubles.
You shouldn’t have to be worrying about their problems and you can’t put things right for them by yourself.
There’s no right way of coping with a death. People respond to a loss in their own individual way. Most people take between one and two years to come to terms with the death of someone close to them.
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Sometimes though, the process gets blocked and it sounds as if your great-grandma is struggling.
She shouldn’t be pouring out her feelings to you.
She needs to talk to a counsellor and she can get support and understanding at Cruse Bereavement Care (0844 477 9400, www.cruse.org.uk).Talk to your mum and your gran about getting some expert help to ease the tension in the home.
My free leaflet about bereavement will also help as it explains more about the stages of grief.